The Off Day

And before the day just ended at 12midnight, I am so going to say that I enjoyed the resting day I had. But the least thing I am looking forward to this week is the straight 3 days of full shift. So what if I am earning $7/hr? It doesn't even give me my health back. And while I plan for this Friday, I sincerely hope that I am still feeling sick so I can bloody hell take an MC on the following day.

I am so not going to care anymore.

And last Saturday I got a final warning from my dumbass lazy area supervisor to not talk to the Pet Consultant anymore. If not I will be transferred out again. Oh really? Try me. Bleahx . . .

First is he ask me to ask the pet consultant anything if I am in doubt.
Second he ask me not to talk to the pet consultant anymore.
Third he wants me to speak more to the customers, but the customers all ran away when we followed them. How to? You tell me?

So what if we might not have regular customers? PLC is having a bad name already anyway.
I heard from a passerby the other at work while cleaning a bit of the small animals display. This is what she said,

PLC is here? Tsk . . . I hate PLC.

So what if PLC is rank the no.1 pet shop in Singapore? Did they really win the heart of many customers?

They don't quarantine the small animals for at least 3 days when they arrive at the shop. They sold them straight away. What if someone comes back and complains about the health or whatsoever of the small animals? How are we going to explain to them?

All they think was earning the sales, making the sales of the month. But what about the small animals? DOn't they consider about the small animals? They are alive! They have feelings too like us. What if I do that to them too?

See, when you work in PLC, you see the many bad sides of them. Not much of the good.

Many customers came in telling me the things are overprice, and they are not buying no matter what explaination we give. Oh I forgot, we are aiming for the rich people in Singapore instead. Tsk tsk . . .

PLC, if you're reading this, if you don't like me, fire me then. But what I state is the truth. Go survey how many outlets of yours does quarantine the small animals at least 3 days? I know out of the 3 outlets I have worked at, 2 doesn't quarantine.

Sick~

Currently I am sick. I have not enough rest due to work. OT almost every day. The thought of working from 9am to 10pm for 3 straight days next week is killing me. =(

Sigh...

I Wish . . .

Sometimes I wished that I was born in a rich family. Not so rich, but just rich enough to send me off to study for a degree instead of having me to worry about saving up like now.

I have always counted myself as lucky to have almost everything I wanted since young. I want a bicycle, my parents got me one. I want a skate scooter, they got me want. I want a laptop, they source out to get me one. But then, now it's a two different story. I need to save up to get what I wanted.

I know now that I am working and that it is appropriate for me to save up my pay. But with a pathetic less than a thousand pay that I brought home isn't enough after calculating for the transportation, food, bills and saving. I am left with peanuts to use it as my own allowance to spend on whatever I want.

Yes, I am ranting about my low pay and ranting about how I need to save like mad to attend a course that I want.
Yes, I am ranting because I am jealous of the wife. She gets to go traveling around the world whereas me, I have been persuading my parents to at least go to other country instead of the usual Thailand trip. But no, they don't want. Sickening isn't it? I want to travel and see the whole world myself instead of watching from the TV screen. Urgh.

Now that I find myself not as lucky as I thought I am. I am just slightly more fortunate to have certain things that I want and where my parents gave them to me.

And now that the wife had her lasik, I am quite tempted to do too. But looking at the price of the medical fee for it, I think it'll take me half of my life to save up for it. So two words, forget it. I'll stick to wearing a spectacle instead. Speaking of which, I need to get a replacement for my spectacle. =.=

See, I need to spend again on things I needed.

This Is What I feel

I feel that I don't belong to this house anymore. The reason is very simple, I shall list it in point form.

• I have a bedroom shared with my elder sister. But ever since she got a boyfriend, took out the long stretch of study table and replaced with ONE study table from Ikea, I feel that I don't have a bedroom after all. It is as though I need a shelter to keep dry during the rainy days, a place to sleep in. Every day, when that fucking molester is at home during the day especially weekday, I don't get to use my bedroom. I need to knock my room to enter. You tell me, why is there such a thing for owner to knock in order to enter his/her own room? Hello! He is considered as a guest, a visitor. Not the owner. Sucker.
• I have to the laundry (although it's just washing), but I still feel that I shouldn't because the lazy ass, referring to my sister and her boyfriend, always accumulate one week's of clothing before dumping it into the washing machine. So what if we got a new and bigger washing machine? It doesn't mean we can overload it!
• I always gets locked out of my room during the night. I need to either knock or use my key to enter. I have an aircon to enjoy during warm weathers, but no I don't. They are always using it almost everyday for hours and hours with the door locked. And I have this mentality since young, an hour a day if I were to use aircon. And so . . . Because of my an hour a day, I didn't switch on during the warm weathers.

I know I might be ranting and repeating whatever I had said all over again. But I just don't feel happy the way they treated my mum as a maid. She cooked meals for them, wash their dishes, make sure they have enough food and do laundry for them. She never complains but I can see she's tired. The best part was, with a high salary of hers, my sister asked to borrow money from my mother. Have you seen such a daughter?

Frustrated

I am simply frustrated of what's happening lately. I know I am an easy target to bully. I know I don't fight back, but that doesn't mean you can climb up onto my head!

Like many said, I have my patience. And you've overstep the border!

First you asked for the side shelves to be taken down. Then you asked for the table to be taken off because you fucking-ly want to re-design the room. OK, forget it. I'm fine with that. But the outcome was not what I wanted. You get a HUGE cupboard, bigger than mine that was handed down to me by my grandmother. Then you bought yourself a HUGE ass table with a nice white chair to go along with. Not to forget, a lock like mini cupboard that matches your table. That takes up half of where the window is.

Then the kind mother gave us a nice big drawer like cupboard. I took two, and you took three drawers. You said it wasn't enough and you wanted one more. Are you nuts! If I give you ONE more, where do I have to place my socks. DON'T FORGET YOU FUCKING SMELLY BEDSHEETS ARE OCCUPYING MY CUPBOARD! I didn't complain about it, and now you're making noises.

Then there's this 3 drawers cabinet. You said I was to take two and one is enough for you. Who knows deep down secretly, you chuck all my things WITHOUT permission into one cramp drawer and you fucking-ly TORN my S.H.E PLAY album. FUCK YOU!

Never mind. I bear with the small little damage on my collection. Best thing was, you pack the whole room, you chuck all my things out. Then you occupy two of my shelves. You threw away one of my bag that I didn't use often. Is this how you treat your sister? What's next? Throw me out of the room for good?

Never mind. I can forget all of the above. But I won't forget this.

YOU BOYFRIEND FUCKING-LY MOLESTED ME LAST LABOUR DAY!
I was badly shaken and traumatized till this date. I kept it mum, because I don't know how to say it to my parents.
So how are you and your molester boyfriend going to pay for my mental health issue?

I just have to let it out because I can't take it any longer.
You treated my friends badly, why should I treat you better?

Unhappiness

Sometimes when I am feeling unhappy, I will keep it within me. Sometimes when I am feeling unhappy, I will let it all out and it have to depend on what is it that bothers me in the first place.

Since many years ago, the sister has been begging my mother to allow her to keep a dog. She even put in good words like she will take care of the dog. Feed him, bathe him and brings him out for walks etc. But then again, after having the dog, things changed. Now I finally understands what the wife mean when there is a dog, things within the family changes drastically. Now I see where the changes has lead to.

When we got Salty a year ago, the cleaning, feeding etc. was done by either me or the mother. She only takes the responsibilities of bringing him to the vet and bathe him. She spent money on the obedience classes which doesn't seem to be of help much till this date only on certain occasion or when my sister uses the way the current instructor taught her to.

Put that aside, she is super rude towards my parents especially when it comes to teaching the dog. And now when we are babysitting this female puppy, my sister isn't happy about it. Here's why:

• Miho is really a good girl and she behaves well, thus she got my parents praise which Salty is jealous about. Then my sister isn't because her son doesn't get the attention he used to and because Salty is jealous.
• She isn't happy the way her colleague brought up the dog. Everything to the groomer, doesn't know the basic commands well.

So far, only these two reasons. The rest, I am not sure yet because Miho is only here roughly for 2 days already. So far, she likes me. I can tell.

I am unhappy. Here's the reason why:

• Salty bullies Miho, and when Miho bites back, she gets the blame too. OK, I do not know much about teaching the dogs, but still it is for self defense, can't she bite back to defense herself?
• When Salty licked my hand, she looked at me in a fierce way and says I am not supposed to wipe on him because of his fur will be tangled or something. But then again, it already is the tangled way.
• She looks at me the irritated way when the wife sleeps in the room. What's wrong with that? The wife didn't really bother about her, why gets irritated. My fault? Then I should be real irritated because of her boyfriend being a freeloader here. Comes here and stay always. Locked me out etc.
• She asked for my help the unfriendly way when she is going out with Salty for class and Miho is blocking the way. What? My fault again?

I find that I can't stay in this place any longer. I can't communicate and live with such a person anymore. Everything I do, is wrong. Whatever.

Grrr . . .

Sometimes it just irks me the way my sister and her boyfriend treats my mother. But then again, whenever I say anything to the mother not to bother about them, the mother will say just forget it. How can I?

OK, I can forget whatever they did to me but definitely not forgive. But for my mother, it is another different story.

I just hate freeloaders, for example, my sister and her boyfriend. Forget that she did not give a single cent to my mother after increment. She did not even try to do housework. The best part was, she told me she did not know how to use the washing machine when I went off for a holiday trip last year with the parents and the wife.

But the boyfriend was super sickening. Use the house's electricity, water and whatever. I got chased out of room every time when he is around. Even when I am not feeling well and needed a bed to lie, no, I cannot even enter my room. I have to sleep in my mother's room instead. Sometimes, the wife and I had no choice but to sleep in the mother's room too. Good thing my mother is understanding. But whatever.

He even need my mother to ask him if he wants dinner, she can buy for him. He even need my mother to specially serve him fruits when he just sit and stretch his hands to take one. Sickening.

Hate him.

Hate You

I H-A-T-E YOU!

I have told myself to forgive you and forget whatever shit you said or did to me countless of times, because you are my father. I kept telling myself no cold wars because the fucking Lunar New Year is arriving. Whatever, I guess it doesn't matter now.

I FREAKING-LY HATE YOU!

I seriously do and I meant it.
Forget about the fight we had last year. Forget about the quarrels and arguments. But I definitely won't forgive you because I am fucking cold blooded now. The thought of how you treated me so differently from my siblings is already making my blood boil.

I tried to not get in your ways many times. I am kind enough to give you my less than 5 months old phone, because I know you needed a new and better one and you got me the phone I wanted, Sony Ericsson W910i. But so what? Not appreciated anyway.

Forget about the usual naggings of me being jobless. Because you do not know how tough it was NOW! And you fucking do not know what I am trying to do. I studied HTML, pick up photography, learn photoshop and search online for many various jobs even those that I do not like. But what for, you do not know what I am going through anyway.

I did not stretch out my hands and say "Old man, lend me money" or "Oi, I've no money. Help me pay my phone bills". No, I did not ask from you since last year. It has been a year I did not asked for pocket money or receiving any from you. All you ever say now was money money money money.

I just merely asked if mum is going to do some shopping at the NTUC nearby, you fuckingly asked me for money instead. You think I print cash is it? I do not you fucking old man. I am jobless, and I am proud to say that. Because even if I am jobless, I digged my piggy bank now for that $1.50 to buy a loaf of bread as supper, which the other half I save for breakfast this morning. No, you do not understand.

You kept saying I did not visit my grandparents, did not do housework. Now you fuckingly tell me, who is the one that accompanies you and mum to the old folks home to visit grandmother? Who is the one that accompanies you and mum to visit grandpa when he was admitted to the hospital, or when he is doing fine at uncle's place? Where's your eldest daughter and youngest son? Who is the one that helps sweeps the floor when no one is home? Who is the one that helps with the laundry when the mother asked for? I don't see your eldest daughter and youngest son helping?

So what male are more dominant than female? Hello! Which fucking century you're living in. Idiot. Hate you! I really hate you!

Every time pin point me like I am someone utterly useless. I tell you! When I make enough money and can afford a house, I'll leave IMMEDIATELY! Not a single cent I will give you, you money grubber or whatever you call you. I'll give my mother instead. Yes, I have not rant enough of what you stupid idiotic father of mine. There's more.

But because the wife tells me not to be angry or unhappy, I shall leave it be.

I H-A-T-E YOU!
I shall give you the cold war starting from today. I shall make you lose face in front of my relatives if you say something which is so freaking not true about me again. Since you don't care about me, why should I?

10 Things I Dislike About My Sister

Here's the 10 things I dislike about my biological sister:

• The dog is always right even if he bullies me or my parents. And we get scolded for 'teaching' the dog the wrong way. Whatever that is, she's always right in educating the dog.
• I'm always the one that got locked out since the age of 16, during the weekends or the holidays. For now, it would be until that moron is off for National Service. How can a guy like him that can't stand going out for sea for months survive in the National Service. One word, hopeless.
• She takes things for granted. For example, she created a mess in the room and kept delaying to tidy it up with various reasons and of course my mum ended up cleaning and tidying it up for her. And when her things went missing, she blames the mother. =.=
• Jump into conclusion. For example when the dog bite my pants and wouldn't let go, I stomped my foot just to show that I'm in a fit of anger. And right at that moment, that dumb dog came right in front of me, and my sister assumed that I kicked him, or rather have the intention to. First thing I should do the other day when the dog ran out was to ignore it completely.
• She brought home the dog insisting that she will look after it. But what happened now? She just dump the dog at home hoping that I would look after it for her since I am not working. Best part was, if I didn't clear the pee and shit he had made, I get the scolding instead. That is when she's at home. The feeding, the cleaning are all done by either by mum or me. All she does as a 'responsible' owner was sending the dog for classes, grooming and visiting the vet when he's unwell. How nice. If she doesn't have the time, don't keep a dog for goodness sake.
• Always make use of me. And me, blindly just allows her to when I know the obvious motive. Irritating. I should just ignore.
• By having a DSLR due to the wife who bought it during her Japan trip to Hokkaido the other time, my freaking sister take for granted when I tries to snap picture of the dog as practice. All she ever say was, "You have so many photos of Salty's picture and didn't bother to share" Not even a thank you when I gave her. So much of a sister.
• Had her boyfriend bully me and didn't even bother to help. This is the kind of sister I have. When I said bully, it meant bully. I wouldn't go further into what bully is that. The wife knows about it and she's super angry about it.
• When she went totally bankrupt, she will ask either me or my mother for money. She is aiming my piggy bank since I am not working currently, although I am still job hunting and waiting for replies. And when you asked to borrow, she will go all gaga over it.
• Every morning, she will make a hell load of noise with her epilator (how do you spell it?), just to shave her leg and armpit. It's either that, or when she's preparing to go out with her boyfriend, they'll pretend that I do not exist and start mumbling or rather talking with the lights on bright. So very considerate. And if you did the same thing, you'll get a hell load of scolding and nagging.

I hate the way she is. That's why I am complaining at this hour of time.

This The Season To Be Sulking~

Welcome to Micky and Mandy's room. Messy isn't it? I super hate it A LOT! I mean seriously, I hate it. I only went into the room to sleep or to take clothes for a shower that's all, and every time I enter the room I am bound to step on something. Anything sharp or not, I just stepped on it especially at night in the dark.

Now people, how many branded bags can you spot in that corner of my room near the door. But I can say, lots of plastic bags and papers. Wonder how they survive in this mess. When I said they, it literally meant my sister and her irritating boyfriend.

Grr . .
Photobucket is giving my problem as there's problem loading the page. And so, my updating of this entry is slow. S-L-O-W

Now let's move to another corner. Now what can you see? I saw a Timberland bag. And many rubbish under it. Ready for the other corner?

Heaps of clothes in that container. Now I am wondering how many bras, underwears, boxers, brief and clothes are there. And how many weeks of clothes that has yet to be washed are there. Now I am thinking, in future when they have their own house, it would be in this manner. Who would want to visit? I mean like seriously, hygiene please!

No wonder sometimes I smelled a pungent smell. Eekk . . .

I will forbid my house to be like that. Honey, you hear that? Your bras, your undies clothes and whatever, all must be put in the laundry basket before washing. Grr . . .

After all the Christmas shopping they had from Watson, to whatever shop, the plastic bags are laid there in another corner of the room. You tell me, how can a normal person live in such place? OK, except me since I'm already used to their mess since the age of 16. Irritating.

Last but not least, the table. See, they can just throw their things anywhere!

If you ask me what I dislike about them, ask the wife. She knows better, plus she dislike them too. Lalalala . . .

Knock Knock

This year, when I couldn't get a job, I blame the economic recession. And when I didn't pass an interview or an interview give me false hope, I blame the people who interviewed me. Not once have I blame it on myself.

So to get my butt out, and knock some sense into me and stop blaming others due to own mistake, I am going to blame myself for the first time.

• I blame myself for having mutiple failures of interviews.
• I blame myself for not trying hard enough.
• I blame myself for not giving my cutest and happiest smile.
• I blame myself for the wrong body language.
• I blame myself for many things.

And now as I sat down, many thoughts came pondering into me.

• I have to get a job soon, so that I can fulfill my dream of applying degree at the age of 21.
• I don't want to wait for an opportunity comes knocking on my door, I want to knock on opportunity's door.
• I need to have the courage to make the first step in life and stop being who I am now.
• Stop Salty from kissing me whenever I sat on the floor day dreaming!

Ah, you can forget about the last point.
But whatever that is, I am going to make a change in life. I need to balance my optimism and pessimism.

I shall pray every night. And I shall search every search engine for a decent and enjoyable job that I like. Even if I have the job I wanted and the people sucks, I should force myself to stay and overcome it because it is an obstacle set ahead of me. But partly because of the economic recession, if I have a job during that period of time. Whatever the reason is, no job hopping as and when I like. Grr . . .

All the best and good luck to me.

Thick Skin Guy

I do not know if you people remembered this Ivan guy, but my Royal Idiotx Family called him Agriculture. It was all during Geography period, and all started giving their crushes or people that are wooing them names from the Geography text.

So this Ivan guy, I can say because I pity him so I accepted his request around 3 years back to be his girlfriend. I thought, may be I should just try to see if it works out and to be with a totally different kind of guy, as in personalities and characters. But because he did not really cherish the relationship back then, we broke up 3 days later. I was not sad, but relieve as I think that by pitying him and get together is utterly a wrong decision. Baby knew about our 3 days relationship, and scolded him stupid for not cherishing the relationship. On the other hand, she was happy about it, because she say if I am not single, we probably would not be officially together as a couple.

Anyway, this Ivan, I do not know what he is thinking. First he asked for a breakup. Then he now he is back asking me that same old question. I did told him I was attached, but I think he just ignore it or just plainly forgotten about it. But that was not the important thing. The important thing now is that he is getting on my nerves.

See, I am quite worried that because of him, my relationship with my dearest wife would be on a rocky road. Although I have promised Baby that be it whatever reason, we cannot just breakup. The only reason to our breakup is that we do not love one another anymore. Even a 3rd party enter our lives, we cannot breakup just because of him/her. After that promise, I sort of less worried, but just afraid that Baby would not be happy.

So since he has been pestering and irritate me with all those mushy mushy words, I have decided to get help from my Evil Sister. Why her? Because she is just plain evil on this kind of situation. And her reply are all so damn evil.

Like asking him to pay for me and my sisters when he asked me if I want to go clubbing with him. From Chivas to Martel. =.=
And he even ask me to bring my cute sisters down. He wants cute ones, no problem. I shall call, Evil Sister, my wife, Yee, Tong, Sia, Cheryly etc etc. Evil Sister say people can have 10brothers, we shall have 10sisters. =.=

He likes hamsters now because of me. Crazy. Then people around me should like hamsters in that case, because of me. =.= What a reply. Idiot. I shall ignore him, because he said sms him when I am free. I shall pretend that I am busy always. Humph.

I had a fight!

People who have seen me performing wushu, or seen me arguing with countless of people will know how fierce I will look. And that is the same old look I am giving to my father and sister, but with more hatred this time.

I quarreled with my sister, then I fought with my father. Things is just that simple.

Sister: Wow! Place the hamsters so high, not afraid they'll run off and get eaten by Salty?
Micky: Shut Up! Can you stop saying about my hamsters always?!
Sister: What? I never always say about your hamsters!
Micky: You did OK! You're always saying about them. Don't make me fed up, if not I'll chase Salty out of the house.
Sister: Crazy.
Micky: I crazy, then you mentally disabled! FUCK! *throws remote control*

And with that, I got a real beating right at my face which swells a little now by my dad. I even dared him to beat me up again because he bloody hell say that raising me is of no use. I remember saying that he can choose not to. Whatever! I just hate the way he scolds me ever since when I was at the age of 14.

Whenever we got a serious fight or arguments, I am always the one got beating and my sister the one that only got scolding. Why? Because they thinks my sister might be too feminine to be beaten, or because that bloody asshole is with her. Either way, I am useless in my father's eyes. Well, I remembered the previous time when we got into a fight, I bleed. This time round, I almost got strangled. But whatever!

Thanks to my mum who came to my rescue and always speak up for me. If not I probably would be dead now. So people, I am so much alive now. I cried because I was angry, not because I was sad. And so after the fight, I called Baby just to let her know something had happened and I wanted her to comfort me.

Funny thing was, she asked if I wanted some alcohol because she said I am always wanting to drink whenever I am down. But to her surprise, I did not want it today and I even told her previously I drank because I wanted her to be angry at me. You know, sometimes when she is angry, she looks so damn cute and adorable. Awww....

Oh, and because of today's happenings, I got 2 small pizza for dinner. Yummy!

Evil Sister also knew about what happened today. Her conclusion was that I am fierce and she even asked me to keep my snake's tail so she would not stepped on it by accident.

What A Friend

I think that after 6 years of friendship, I should just end it. I should have learnt my lesson, but I guess I didn't. I have been telling me that Loke is not bad and it just that people just dislike her in many ways. I didn't bother to look at her bad points, instead I look at it on a brighter side.

After 5 years of secondary school life, I've seen the life she's leading. Changing boyfriend every month or week like as though she's changing clothes. Seeing her getting intro trouble and didn't really bother about schoolwork. And she's proud of herself for the grades she had.

Although she shared with me about Catholic and Christian's life together with Hazel. I thought maybe with God's help I would just get through that 5 years of friendship. But I thought wrong after all that I have gone through.

Since Monday afternoon, this idiotic girl totally ignored my sms-es. And so, I have yet to get the video on hand. It's just something in me that told me to give her another chance time after time after all those disappointment she gave me and my friends. Because what I've learnt was forgive and forget. I did that, but not now I guess.

Whatever that is, I would try to get my hands on the video. Baby says Loke is selfcentred. Tong says Loke is hopeless. My biological sister says Loke is selfish. Micky says, I won't want such a friend anymore. =x

-------------

Interview yesterday has went well. I won't say I made it, and I would try not to have my hopes high. I'll be meeting the boss later at 4pm for a chat I suppose. My graduation project, the video, the written work and the presentation slides are with them. So, just hope that with this I could get the job even without the other video that I had done with the group.

And if I got the job, I would just save my way towards degree. I know how much it means for Baby to see me getting a degree and move forward in my career and life. And yes, I want to earn more so that I can have an engagement party in the future. Just a few would be invited because I don't want the whole place turn upside down. *smile* Baby, you've promised me to have an engagement party, no backing out. =x

I'll be seeing my grandmother real soon. Real soon~

Not a good weekend spent

I didn't really had a nice and good weekend spent. Including a few days of my weekday, apart from being with Baby. So I shall let my mind think of the upcoming trip to Thailand in around 14 more days. *happy* All though I may get giddy due to the bus ride, I'd still be happy because I've Baby with me to accompany me. Sad thing was, no entertainment for me during the ride.

Reasons:

• I'll get giddy if I were to read a book
• I'll get giddy if I were to play NDS/PSP
• I'll get giddy if I watch Baby play NDS

See, I'm so poor thing. Yes, we're taking bus to Hatt Yai, Thailand. There's no budget airplane that would take us there. So pathetic. What's wrong with those budget airplane? Don't want such a potential customer like me? All though the budget airplane doesn't give me a nice and comfortable ride, but still, I can read a book. *angry*

Anyway, I didn't really had a good weekend and a few weekdays. Apart from last Friday, I quite enjoyed myself. :D

Reasons why I didn't enjoy my weekend and a few weekdays:

• Sis and her boyfriend occupying the room
• When they're around, they'll be an obstacle for me and Baby to enjoy our time together. You know, couples need some time to bond. Plus, my relationship, can't do it openly at home, unless no one is at home other than the hamsters and dog.
• I had to worry a lot of things, and take precautions.
• I don't get to play with Salty much, although I don't really play with him. =x
• I'd hear lots of comments that I don't wish to hear
• Locked out of my room till 1am in the wee hours

Yesterday Salty had his obedience class. Sis's boyfriend tagged along. And Makiko's dog doesn't obey the command given, or maybe the dog doesn't know what the command was when Makiko was trying to teach her. And because of this, sis's boyfriend gave some comments a few hours ago to my sister. People had difficulty in getting their dog to be in a down position, can't blame them. Like the trainer had mentioned, dogs doesn't like to be in the down position, as it makes them feel weak and submissive. Why give so many comments? If he's clever, why not he'll try to help in the first place right? *humph* Angry! Not Makiko's fault. *humph*

OK, not my problem also. But Makiko is friendly. I heard many un-wanted comments. So I shall pretend I didn't hear anything at all.

Accompanied Baby to Bukit Merah again. I waited for 2hours and 30 mins. Thankfully, not 3 hours, if not I sure explode. I tried not be angry, but feel sad, cos I waited for so long. And because of some thing that had happened during our bus ride there, I felt guilty, so I went to get something for Baby. I thought of donut, but the donut there doesn't look attractive. I went to NTUC, but there isn't anything nice. I saw my favourite ice cream, thought of buying. But the queue was so long, so gave the thought up.

And finally, I saw this pig mooncake at a nearby bakery. It's cute and fat, so I bought one for Baby. Hopefully she likes, although she had already eaten the head. =x It comes with pink ribbon tied on the neck. I know Baby likes to eat this, so I got it for her. Although it's not mid-autumn festival, but still, it's the thought that counts. :D

I saw one bolster at NTUC, a Mickey Mouse bolster. Quite soft when I hug it. I thought of showing Baby, but because due to the long wait, I've totally forgotten about that. =.=

GoodBye Degree

After hours of silence at home, after hours of 'nice' chat, after hours of ignoring, Micky has finally come to a conclusion.

I'M SAYING GOODBYE TO MY DEGREE.

Yes, you got me right. Goodbye degree. I know it's too much to ask for my dad to lend me $800 for the first installment. But, I had the intention of returning him. Somehow, the nice chat with him didn't work out. I wouldn't want to try it the hard way either. And he showed me the least interest through his eyes.

No matter how hard Baby would try to convince me the importance of having a degree, it was of no use. Baby, save your breathe. I don't wish to take the degree. Lesser burden for everyone. No one need to be the guarantor for my study loan. Father don't need to squeeze out even just 5cents for the degree. And I don't need to freaking-ly wait for the University to send me a letter of approval or rejection. Save time, save money, save the emotions that would be spread across.

So when my father talks to me about degree and having to take part-time for the course, I would show him that I'm totally not interested in taking it. And when he nags about it, I would say, I wouldn't want to take the degree anymore. What's the use of having a degree? What's the use of having high paid job?

I only ask for a happy family. Baby, could you give me that? And don't press me further regarding about this matter?

• I would get a job that I want
• I would not give a single cent to my parents. Say whatever you want about me people, I'm just an ungrateful daughter my parents had brought me up
• I would not want to further my education
• I just want to pass my current paper and get my diploma certificate. Recognise or not, it doesn't really matter
• Given up all hopes of my future
• Can't afford even a bicycle for Baby any longer, but would try to give her happiness in my own ways
• I've learnt that by talking things nicely and sharing of my future plans with my family is of no use
• I came to realise that my parents doesn't support me wholeheartedly of the things I want to do, even though they say I could study whatever I want
• I would fall on deaf ears when my father nags at me about jobs
• I would take my own sweet time to find the suitable job available in Singapore
• If I had a kid in the future, I would put aside all my savings for his/her education, or on the courses they like to attend
• If I had a kid in the future, I would support them in whatever they wish to do wholeheartedly. Illegal stuffs are an exceptional.

He's not a Human

If you're Xiaxue's blog, you get what I mean. The recent post of a father who imprison his daughter, made her a sex slave, where she gave birth to 7 kids. I'm not sure how the kids would call the guy. Father? Grandfather?

The photo of the man, he really looks sinister. He shouldn't have let been let off, he had left a permanent scar on those people whom he had hurt. A poor baby who died after it was born. His granddaughter/daughter, has barely any teeth left and in a critical condition.

I agree to Xiaxue that such person shouldn't be left off. But on the part of cutting off the penis and balls, this, I'm not really sure if I agree with her. But whatever it was, she has her points listed which I fully agree to.

What a guy. And poor Elizabeth. I'm not really good with words, neither am I a good journalist/reporter. Whatever I read comes from other's blog, and I'm just stating what I feel, that's all. No full details of the incident, nor of the report.

Whatever it was, you may goggle it on Josef Fritzl Case. You'll get the details in various sites and blogs.
----------

I've been tagged by Sia, so here goes:

1)At what age do you wish to marry?
Married


2)What you want the most now?
Happiness & World Peace


3)Who is the person you trust the most?
A handful of them, not going to name them

4)Do you think you have enough confidence?
Nope, because I don't

5)If you have a dream to come true, what would it be?
I want all my dreams to come true. (copy Sia)

6)Do you believe in seeing a rainbow after the rain?
Yes, definately :D

7)What is your goal for this year?
To be a good wife :D

8)Do you believe in eternal love?
Yes, if the current one I'm having now is successful

9)if you're allowed to change a thing, just 1 thing in your life, what would it be?
To enjoy life to the fullest

10)What feeling do you love the most?
To be loved

11)What do you most fear?
Quite a number of fears within me

12)What feeling do you hate the most?
The feeling that I hated most

13)Do you cherish every single friendship of yours?
Yes, I think so

14) Do you believe in love at first sight?
No, because Honey and I don't. =x

15)What do you think is the most important thing in your life?
My family, and that includes my Honey. She's part of my family :D

16)Who do you hope to be always there for you?
Honey

17) Which country/countries you wish to visit most?
Taiwan, Paris, Japan

18)Who cares for you the most?
My family and Honey


19)Which date you like the most?
8 Oct, 1 Dec, 21 Feb and 8 June :D


20) How are you feeling right now?
Sleepy and hungry

Instructions: Remove 1 question from above,and add in your personal question,make it a total of 20 questions, then tag 8 people in your list,list them out at the end of this post.Notify them in their chatbox that he/she has been tagged.Whoever does the tag will have a blessing from all.

Tagged :
1. Goh
2. Honey
3. Tong
4. Woon Cheng
5. Yan Ling
6 to 8. Anyone who wish to do this
--------------

I know this entry would be long, but who cares. There's so many things I really wish to share. Hack it if it's mostly about my daily life. But still, hopefully, within my life there's at least something worth looking back at in future, right?

The Royal Idiotx are planning to meet up, which I don't know when. Most probably end of the year. They suggested in going overseas. And Micky doesn't have the money to. First, Loke said we're going over to Taiwan end of the year. Now, another trip out of the country at the end of the year? How many trips do they want to go? I'm broke. And it also have to depends if I'm allowed to. *hint hint*

I love playing poker with Honey. I'm not sure of what's the name, is it Black Jack? Anyway, I love playing though I'm not really sure of adding the figures up. But still, I've won quite a number of rounds. Honey knows what I'm referring to. :D

I love playing NDS Mario Kart with Honey to. *laughs*

Mother's Day is arriving, got any present for your mum? Or planning to bring her out? Or being a good girl for the day by doing the housework at home? And the list goes on.

I'm doing nothing for my mum. Because I'm not a good girl. But Honey plans to bring my mum out instead. =.= I didn't even give her mum anything, except for a drawing which and hopefully her mum likes it. =x

The results of not working part-time and having not enough cash. Bleahx . . .

Irritated

Ever felt mad about your job being planned by your parents. Let say, where to interview, what job position being applied without your consent? Sometimes you just wouldn't want to argue with them, and headed off for interview like a controlled puppet?

This is what I'm going through now. Being said about being promoted seems so easy, but did they ever know you have to go through lots of obstacles to be a manager or even a supervisor? Things doesn't comes easy like we have always said.

Not to mention about a diploma not specialize in that area. I'm more into TV production, not estate management. Irritating things that I have to learn all over again if I was given the job.

I'm being pestered for 2 days, as in two whole days. Maybe not, maybe would 3 whole days just to accept my father's offer and go for the interview. Mum says it's worth to try, and work temporary. Dad says gain experience, and you'll get promoted in one year time. Rubbish~ If it's that easy to get promoted, everyone would be in a higher position now isn't it? Plus . . . Even if I were to work there, I doubt I'll be happy.

I guess I've just given my dad a not so happy and nice face. Needless to say, I hasn't been talking to him much lately due to this. I'm being pestered to look for job. But in the end, I'm given an interview which I don't know what position I'd be applying for. Neither do I know much about the company.

Why can't I have to do work in an environment I like? Irritating. Bahx . . . Just ranting my displeasure. Ignore it, and don't ask me questions.

Untitled

Headache has come to me when I woke up this morning. I'm still tired, both physically and mentally. I'm too lazy to think back what happened last night/early this morning. I'm too lazy to absorb/recall whatever was said last night/early this morning. I'm just plain lazy to do anything, including studying Public Relations which the examination was on this coming Monday.

I thought of giving up whatever I had now. I thought of just trying to ignore everything and escape from the reality. I thought of just sleep throughout the whole morning till late afternoon, and not doing anything else other than eat and sleep.

I think I should have done some self reflection. I think I should have change myself in many many ways. I think I should have not started what I have started in the first place. I think I should have end it all, but still I didn't wish to. All in all, I don't know what I'm saying, neither do I know what I really want. Micky is still in a sleepy mood, my brain has yet to refresh and absorb whatever has already happened.

I'm never a good daughter, neither can I be a good girlfriend/wife. I'm never a good student, neither can I top the class with good results. I'm never good in sports as I'm always falling sick when I was young, resulting having long term MC for Physical Education since Primary One till Secondary Two. I'm always never good in anything, other than eat and sleep.

I can't be the good daughter my parents wanted. Neither can I be a good girlfriend/wife my girl wanted. I might have screwed up certain things in my life, but I will never know where it was screwed up.

I ought to change myself in so many ways and I really should.

It's 3:42am

It's early in the morning, 3:42am and I think I'm not going to have any sleep for the day. I'm rushing through my treatment for my TV Production, which I'm given this very early morning at around 2am to 3am. OK, it's between that time. And I'm so ranting my displeasure at such hour. Mum is chasing me off to bed every now and than, I don't think I'm going to have any sleep. Or most probably, when I'm way too tired; I would just bang my head right on my study desk and off to LaLa Land.

Having a big headache on how to write a treatment. Somehow, the treatment that I wrote with much brain juice being squeezed out didn't seem much appreciated. My eye lid is getting heavier, and I'm so trying to get myself to stay awake at such early hour. I need sleep, I can't go without sleep if not my mood/temper won't be good. Most probably, I'll scream, I'll shout, I'll argue or maybe give you a punch if my fist just fly straight at your face. I mean seriously, MICKY CAN'T THINK WHEN SHE IS THIS TIRED! What a life I'm having now.

The sky is dark and my stomach is grumbling due to my hunger; and I refused to grab a bite. I'm telling myself that I have to, no matter what, finish this treatment. I could hear snores! The samples Dear has given me is not helping me at all. I'm too, or way too tired to read it nor absorb the information(s) given. But I appreciate what Dear has done for me. Thanks for the lullaby almost every night, though I didn't ask for it tonight.

Seriously, I don't like last minute work, as it won't be a good work. Editing of video has yet to be done. Proposal has yet to be done. Script, I think it's half done. Treatment, I'm still doing it while taking a break to write this entry. Most probably, my entry is all about my ranting of displeasure. And I am certain that my eye-bag will get much more obvious than before all thanks to this very last minute work.

6 members in a group, 2 squeezing out brain juices and tries to get everything done, while 4 is shaking legs away. Reason is very very very simple. This little girl, by the surname, Loke, didn't assign jobs to all. She made the decisions and bought all the unnecessary stuffs without informing us. Next, when the 4 China girls asked if there's anything they could do/help, Loke replied saying they aren't much of a help as they don't know how to do it. Great, she didn't give them the chance to, how would she knows? By what my evil sister, Lei, told me that I should have told Loke my displeasure.

But God wants me to refrain from anger. An angry man hurts a innocent soul. Well, I doubt Loke is innocent. Yup, ever since I accept Jesus Christ, I could see the change in me. My temper rarely shows out the displeasure I had within me; unless necessary I assume.

If I ever over-stop when I'm taking train in the morning, I'm sure my face will be as black as my laptop. Maybe my love for Pandas should stop if I don't want to be one of them. Maybe my love for Polar Bear should increase more, so I won't have a very obvious eye-bag. =.=